Favorite Things!

Favorite things for this week:

3. Alex Ovechkin dressed as Alexander the Great with a hockey stick and a horse with emo bangs. Snagged from Russian Machine Never Breaks.

2. The Official Return of The X-Files! To celebrate, a vintage picture of David Duchovny wearing a teacup.

1. Marian Hossa celebrating his daughter Mia's birthday with his family. All together now: D'awwwwwww!

Favorite Things--Video Edition!

An exuberant 1-year-old American bulldog mix named King interrupts the weather report on live TV, possibly in search of steak treats.


This pit bull loves when his daddy sings to him.



Jonathan Toews buys Girl Scout cookies and fails at ironing. Also there is a puppy.

Favorite Things Friday the THIRTEENTH!!

This week's Favorite Things.


Chris Pratt, Chris Evans, and Jimmy Fallon photobomb people at the Super Bowl.

Alex Ovechkin donates a car to the Washington Ice Dogs of the American Special Hockey League. You gotta read this whole story. It's worth it.

I know this one's been all over, but dude! The oldest man in Australia knits TINY TINY sweaters for TINY TINY penguins to help them recover from oil spills. If that doesn't make your heart all squishy I don't know what will. (Also, one of these penguins needs a Pens jersey. Get on that, oldest man in Australia!)

Audio Book Recs, or How to Get Tom Hiddleston into Your Bedroom

I really like audiobooks. I know they're not everyone's cup of tea, but for me, after a long day of editing, it's really nice to snuggle up in bed with the dog and let somebody read to me for a change.

Of course, some readers mesh with the story better than others. And some readers are hot British dudes.

Which brings me to something I discovered on Scribd a while ago, which I'm going to recommend.

There is a series of audiobooks of the James Bond series, all read by British actors. So if you want to end your evening or enhance your car ride with the dulcet tones of David Tennant or Tom Hiddleston, then get ye to your favorite audiobook outlet and grab these. I've only listened to one so far, because I'm being stubborn about reading the series in order, but I enjoyed the reading.

This link will take you to Amazon, to On Her Majesty's Secret Service, read by David Tennant. If you're curious, Tom Hiddleston reads Octopussy/The Living Daylights. (Disclaimer--I do NOT get affiliate payments from Amazon, because Amazon doesn't like Colorado.)

Favorite Things

The holidays are over (finally), and my schedule is heading back toward normal, whatever that is. So here are my favorite things on the Internet this week.



3. This video of Sidney Crosby and other NHLers who aren't Sidney Crosby surprising a group of sledge hockey players. Watch it. It's not that long. Have a Kleenex ready.



2. "Let it Go." IN RUSSIAN, PEOPLE!!! (And in Russian, it's "Let it Go and Forget."

1. This might actually be my favorite thing on the Internet EVER. Too bad we lost. Damn you, Troy Brouwer!! Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal!

Favorite Friday Things

Well, I've been in bed all day with what appears to be a stomach bug, so I needed Favorite Things today. So here we go:

3. This .gif of Ben Smith's fabulous arms.

2. This picture of Chris Pratt hangin' with a velociraptor. (From Jurassic World promo)

3. This pic of Marian Hossa at the Chicago Blackhawks Christmas party with his daughter Mia. (From blackhawks.nhl.com)

If anyone sees a trend developing with these posts, please don't point it out to me. (I'm SICK!! I'll look at hockey players and Chris Pratt if I want to!!)

My Three Favorite Things on the Internet This Week

The Internet is a glorious repository of wonderful things. Here are my three favorite things from the Internet this week:

3. This description of Chris Pratt, by his Parks and Recreation co-star Nick Offerman:

2. This picture of Evgeni Malkin in a Santa Hat:

1. This tweet from Sasha Devlin. (Yes, I know this one's a bit self-serving, but man, it made me all verklempt so deal with it):

PRESS RELEASE—Evgeni Malkin a Vampire?

 

Evgeni Malkin (far right) appears to be garbed for an initiation rite at the House of the Eternal.

Has Malkin been Turned? The LVH investigates.

(Quebec, October 2014)

Photos surfaced last night indicating Evgeni Malkin of the Pittsburgh Penguins, arguably one of the best hockey players in the world, has been Turned. The pictures were released in the guise of a Halloween party, with Malkin and other NHL players in full costume. However, the photos clearly show Malkin baring fangs and wearing traditional ceremonial garb used in initiation rites in the House of the Eternal, the fundamentalist vampire church that has become quite vocal about vampire rights in the lead-up to this fall’s mid-term elections in the US.

“If Malkin’s been Turned, he needs to contact us,” states Patricia Beaulieu, LVH Commissioner. “We have numerous rules in place stating that an NHL player, if he’s been Turned, must leave the NHL and play for the LVH if he chooses to continue to play hockey.”

“We have no evidence Malkin’s no longer human,” counters NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman. “It’s a Halloween costume, for God’s sake. Get your fangy heads out of your asses.”

We also reached out to Travis Payne, right wing for the LVH’s Chicago Cobras, whose fight with the NHL to have his name engraved on the Stanley Cup has been well-publicized. “Those fangs are fake,” says Payne, “and nobody has fangs that look that fake unless they’re wearing them over real fangs. Trust me on that. Malkin needs to face the music. They kicked me out of the league so fast it’d make your head spin—I don’t know why they’re waffling on this guy.”

More information as the story develops.

How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Hockey

I've mentioned before that Blood on the Ice is the direct result of my Evil BFF's five-year crusade to turn me into a hockey fan. You might wonder how she accomplished this evil deed. Well, she sent me a blueprint I could share for those of you who might be trying to drag a friend down the path of evil. Or, you know, just trying to get them to like things. This blueprint works. I'm living proof.

Talk about what you love....A LOT


Humor helps

So does shiny


Shiny is really fucking awesome


Sparkly isn't bad either


Neither is bromance


...or pretty

Sometimes more direct persuasion is necessary


Now that the groundwork has been laid, share things that may be to their tastes


Lather, rinse, repeat


Did I mention the repeat?


Reference stupid memes when sending links...cock goes where?


Weird rituals are always interest grabbing


Quality portraits are a good idea

Suits are nice


As is bad hair


Nakedness is always good


Mocking is too


When you have sufficiently brought them over to the dark side...jump for joy


Celebrate!


Try not to smirk too much


PROFIT

In retrospect, I'm kind of ashamed that I responded to a campaign that employed so much exposure to Ryan Kesler.

Beware the Candy

I'm here today to talk about the horrors of addiction. Not to drugs or alcohol or even Nutella--that would be far too serious for this blog. No, I'm talking about the soul-crushing, life-ruining horror that is Candy Crush.

If you've never played Candy Crush--and if you haven't, for the love of God don't start now--it's a member of the Bejeweled family of Horribly Addictive Games where you swap pairs of pieces to create matches of at least three in a row to eliminate those pieces from the board. Four or five in a row will create one-up pieces that explode larger portions of your board. In Candy Crush, the pieces are shaped like--you guessed it--candy. As you progress, the game presents new challenges like weird bottlenecks, portal squares, bits of chocolate that creep across the board like some kind of brown gelatinous ooze, and licorice strings that introduce your bits of candy to the joys of bondage. Cut scenes feature frightening little girls, whales, bunnies, and other creatures that appear to be constructed of cut paper fastened together with brass brads. I don't even want to know what kind of post-apocalyptic world this is, where everything has transformed to permutations of sugar.

I don't know why this type of game is so damn addictive. I went through a thankfully short but intense relationship with Bejeweled a few years ago that I was able to end fairly gracefully after spending hours swapping jewels while watching original series Star Trek. But Candy Crush? Man, I wish I could quit you. Instead I fritter away hours swapping bits of candy that look like Chiclets and Good n Plentys and smacking myself on the head when I accidentally waste one of those cupcake things with the sprinkles. If you do play--and PLEASE don't, I beg you--you'll know you've hit rock bottom when you're up at midnight paging through the app store looking for a game that's similar to Candy Crush that you can play while you're waiting for your allotment of lives to replenish. My not-Candy-Crush game of choice is Jewel Mania.

I've done my time in addiction and recovery with Farmville, Words With Friends, and even Angry Birds. I've justified time spent with these games because often I work out plot tangles while I'm feeding my bunnies or crushing pigs under complex architectural constructions. But Candy Crush is well on its way to becoming my undoing. I can't warn you strongly enough to stay away from it. And if you succumb to the allure of the bright candies--well, that's between you and your god.

How We Became a Cat House

You could say it started with the mice. I lived in this house for I think about three years before they started showing up, running around like they owned the place, staring at me while I was trying to watch TV, sitting in the dog's food dish chowing like there was no tomorrow and leaving gross mouse deposits in my expensive stoneware under the stove. Our ferrets seemed to deter them a little, but this tactic only seemed to work consistently at the back of the house where the ferrets actually live. The kitchen and living room, not so much. Traps? Yeah. One week I caught seven mice. Then they started just eating the peanut butter out of the traps and going on their merry way. It was like I'd wipe out one generation only to have them breed up the next generation better, stronger, faster, and addicted to peanut butter. Natural repellant worked for a while, too. But when I replenished that, it seemed to lose its effectiveness. This generation has added the characteristic of enjoying the scent of very strong balsam pine.

So for the last few weeks, every night between about 7:30 and 9:00, this mouse would run across the kitchen floor, plant himself in the dog food dish, have dinner, then run off. I killed him once. Another mouse came back and did the same exact thing. The dog would sit next to me and watch. Seriously. This is the most useless dog known to man when it comes to pest control. Okay, once she smooshed a spider. Give her props for that.

Everybody kept telling me to get a cat. And I kept saying no, I can't get a cat. I'm allergic. Cats make me miserable. It s a valid reason. But damn, the mice.

So I started doing some research. A few breeds of cat produce less of the enzyme in their saliva that causes cat-specific allergies. One of these is the Siberian cat. Another is the Russian blue. I looked at Devon and Cornish Rexes. My sister, who also has cat allergies, had a Cornish Rex or two. But I didn't really want to hunt up a breeder, spend a ton of money, and, most importantly, miss the opportunity to rescue a cat that might otherwise end up euthanized.

Next step--allergy testing. My daughter was off visiting a friend, and I needed to go pick her up that day, so I took a Claritin in the morning and planned to make a side trip to PetSmart to find a kitty and cuddle it and pet it and call it George and see how the Claritin held up.

My daughter kept delaying. Apparently they were lounging around the house watching Star Trek and Firefly. I couldn't really condemn that behavior. But what I'd anticipated as a lunch trip turned into dinner time.

Eventually I made it to PetSmart. And there, in their larger cage, was a passel of kittens. One was sitting near the back, a little gray girl with green eyes. She looked straight at me and blinked. And I went oh, shit.

I think we all know how this story ends. We've all been there. We take home the cat we know we probably shouldn't take home. We name it Pond, then Storm, then argue that neither one is quite right. But here's the kicker--the cat had arrived at PetSmart an hour before I walked in. If my daughter hadn't been forced to consume geekery, I never would have seen the cat at all. And, as my daughter and I looked over the cat's records, we discovered she'd been fostered by a friend of the friend who had force-fed said geekery. It was one too many coincidences for me.

So here I sit, typing this blog post on my iPad while Stormy-Pond (sorry--my daughter says it's more properly "Stormageddon Sharknado") tries to attack the iPad. She keeps missing and biting my knee instead. The dog is sitting in the living room wondering what the hell is going on. And I'm praying to the gods of allergies that the Claritin and the Zyrtec hold up, because damn, this cat is adorable.

Oh, Good Grief, It's November Again

In case anybody's been living under a rock for the last few years, November is NaNoWriMo month. This phenomenon seems to be getting more popular every year. (Yes, you damn kids, get the hell offa my NaNoWriMo lawn!)

I've participated in NNWM several times, and have yet to make the 50,000 word goal. I tend to hit about 30-35K, although I think I might have flirted with 40K last year. Formal participation kind of makes me sad because of this inability to "win," so I've been doing it informally the last couple of years.

I'm going to do the same this year. I have a WIP that's about 2/3 done. I think I have 25-30,000 words left on it, so my goal for this month will be to get to that place where I write "THE END" on the last page. (Actually I don't write THE END on the last page. I usually write some kind of weird squiggly thing. But you get what I mean.)

I'll start today with my initial wordcount graphic. I snarfed this over at Writertopia, and I think it's cool so I'm using it, so there. I'll update it whenever I feel like it and maybe post a short excerpt or two here and there. The book I'll be working on is represented on its own Pinterest board here. I'll probably be adding stuff there, too--I still have a lot of research to do on this book, and God forbid I should do the research before I start writing. That would be too easy.

Anyway, best of luck to everyone else who's NaNo-ing. I hope we all crank out many words, and that some of them are even good!

Blood Shots for Halloween (or any time)

Every good vampire wants a decent blood shot for breakfast. Or lunch, or dinner. Or a snack, when the munchies hit. Here are some recipes for high-quality blood shots you can serve your favorite vampire any time of the year. (Note: Your favorite vampire will probably want to change the ratio of blood to liquor a bit...)

Ruby Wednesday
Fill a shot glass about 2/3 full with a good vodka
Dribble blood* slowly into the vodka for that lovely layered effect.

Virgin’s Kiss
Vanilla rum
Blood
Again, dribble the blood slowly for a layered look. Vampires like that.

The Harlot
Replace the rum/vodka with pomegranate liqueur. Garnish with lime.

Velvet Dick
Layer butterscotch schnapps and Irish crème and top with blood. (This is basically a Slippery Nipple with blood substituted for Grenadine.)

Bring one of these out for your next vampire party, or for that new vampire you’ve decided to date, and see how the evening turns out.

*I used cherry-flavored candy blood from my local Halloween store. It’s overly sweet and sort of artificial-tasting, but not awful. You might do yourself a favor by using Grenadine instead, although it doesn’t have the same rich, red blood color as the fake blood. 

(Thanks to Belinda [aka Evil Best Friend] for help naming the drinks.)

Friday Links on Tuesday: Software for Writers

Just about every day I see a post from someone somewhere lauding the latest app or software or online tool that has revolutionized their writing, their workflow, their love life or all of the above. I usually take a look at them. Most of them I don't try for various reasons. But a few things I've integrated into my work day have really made a huge difference for me. Today's links are about those few tools that I've found Incredibly Useful.

Evernote. I was late on the bandwagon with this one. I swear I tried it a year or so ago and wasn't able to get it to download, or couldn't figure out how it worked, or something. Then, a few months ago, I tried again, and I haven't looked back. It's an excellent tool to organize research notes, random articles that look like they might evolve into story ideas, or just piddly things I need to remember. This article from Open Forum tells more about ways you can utilize it in all its wondermousness.

And another note on Evernote--yesterday I did a "library day," where I headed down the hill to a big library where I can sit in a study carrel and write uninterrupted. I brought my Kindle and my phone. On my Kindle, I had several books I was using for research for the story I was working on. On the phone, I had just installed Evernote as well as an Evernote widget to make access to all my research easy cheesy. Between the Kindle and the phone, I had everything I needed without lugging my MacBook Pro with me. It was convenient and easy and kind of awesome. Except now it's got me thinking an iPad would be EVEN COOLER!! (KK wants ALL THE GADGETS!)

Scrivener. I don't even know how I wrote anything without Scrivener. It's like the Avengers of writing software. Seriously. With Joss Whedon thrown in on the side. I write better, stronger, faster--and I didn't even have to crash a test plane to do it. (Oops, sorry, switched superhero types there...) The combo of Evernote and Scrivener is like Thor's Hammer, Captain America's Shield, Hawkeye's cool bow thingie and Black Widow's general basassedness all in one. But you don't have to take my word for it. Here's an article from The Creative Penn with more.

Kanban. This isn't so much software as a tool for managing workflow. However, I use the online tool mentioned on the site. I've only been using this for a couple of weeks but it's already kicked me into a higher gear as far as getting things done efficiently and increasing my productivity. If you love writing things on sticky notes and moving them around, chances are good you'll like this. The link above explains the process, and the online tool can be found at kanbanflow.com.

And here's a bonus link for those who like their iPhones/iPads--I don't have either, so I haven't tested any of these, but the article looks like it has some neat ideas:

The Book Designer--10 Ways Free iPhone Apps Supercharge Writers.

Any tools, software or doohickies you can't do without? Share in the comments below.

It's That Time of Year Again...

Well, looks like I disappeared into the blogosphere for a couple of weeks there. In my defense, I was enthralled by this little missive called the 1040, and its companion volume Schedule C. I'm done with that now, thank God, so I'm going to start blogging some more...

For the next few weeks, I'm going to post an excerpt from one of my novels every Tuesday and getting those links posts out on Fridays again. I'll also be blogging over at Notes on Vellum once I get my head into gear, so I'll post links to those blogs. I hope you enjoy the excerpts--some of them will be from older books that have fallen off even my radar!

I'll also have another blog hop coming up shortly, so keep an eye out.

How KK’s Weird Breakfast Choices Can Help Your Writing

What is this, you ask? Has KK lost her mind? Has she decided she should run a food blog even though she can’t follow recipes to save her life?

Also—wtf is that picture?

Well, I’ll tell you. That picture is French toast with real, organic butter, organic maple syrup, a banana, and some shredded cheese.

If you’re like most people, you were hanging along okay until I got to the cheese. At the cheese, you probably went… Okay…why cheese?

Trust me. It’s really good.

When I was a kid, I lived near Champaign-Urbana, Illinois. There was a restaurant in Champaign that served French toast with bananas and cheese. (They also topped it with whipped cream, but I always thought that was overkill.) They called it a Cinderella, and it was fabulous.

Here’s another food story. We used to drive down to Olney a lot to visit my cousins. When we spent the night, they would make pancakes and put peanut butter on them. (And syrup. The “overkill” ingredient is vital for this one.) I thought it was weird at first, but when I tried it, I got hooked. Pancakes with peanut butter is awesome.

What’s the point? I think it’s something like this: if you’re writing a story or a book or a poem, you often find yourself moving down tried and true paths. You’re okay with the French toast with butter and syrup. Banana? That’s fine—fruit’s a traditional accompaniment for French toast. But cheese? With the banana and the syrup (and whipped cream if you’re a purist)? That’s just weird!

And then you taste it. And it’s fabulous.

So what’s the cheese you can toss onto your French toast book? Or the peanut butter for your traditional novel pancake? Is it a super quirky character you don’t think would ever work? A romance hero who doesn’t like to be touched? A powerful warrior with claustrophobia? Play with ideas. Eventually you’ll hit on something that sounds like it would never work but which, in practice, works perfectly.

Dude! What's Going On Here?!

Things have been going crazy the last few weeks for Where There's a Will. Amazon marked the kindle edition down to $.95 (that's right NINETY-FIVE CENTS--that's less than a DOLLAR), and it has since soared into the top 100 best selling kindle romance books. And it's been hanging out there for a while. I have no idea how long this great deal will be in effect, so go grab it while you can!

In addition, I've seen reviews mentioning that WTaW was the first book the reviewer read on their new kindle, and another review saying it was the reviewer's first book of 2011. The latter review appeared at Paranormal Book Reviews:

"I liked this book. It was a contemporary romance without the paranormal slant that I usually go for (and everyone knows that I have a hard time with the contemporary romances!) but I enjoyed it. Malcolm was kinda yummy. Sometimes I wonder why more men don't wear kilts."

Thanks, Kelly! And I wonder why more men don't wear kilts, too. It should be a law...

Here's a link to the bargain-priced kindle version of WTaW, for those looking for something to load onto that new Christmas kindle. It's so darn cheap I'm tempted to buy a few copies for myself...

KK on the RADIO!

Is that anything like TV on the Radio? Right, probably not...

Anyway...

If you missed my appearance on BlogTalkRadio on Monday night, it's now archived here. It was a fun interview. It's about a half hour long, and I talk about current books, old books, and possible upcoming books, as well as a bit about the inspiration for and writing of Where There's a Will. Drop by and have a listen!

Why I Save Everything...

I've been working on tweaking a manuscript for submission, one I wrote quite some time ago that I've rewritten a couple of times since. When I hit a very important scene near the beginning of the story (the hero and heroine's "first time"), I realized it really wasn't working. The dynamic of the scene was totally wrong, and didn't fit the message I was trying to get across.

Faced with having to rewrite the whole scene, I started dithering. Then it occurred to me that, in an earlier draft, I had taken a completely different approach, one that I thought would fit much better with my new ideas of the story. Lo and behold, there was my earlier draft, saved from a desktop that's no longer with us, transferred to a laptop that I'm not using too much anymore, in a folder sitting on my external server where I'd backed everything up. One quick FTP from the server to my Mac, and I've got that old draft in Scrivener where I can cannibalize it.

Sometimes it's good to be a packrat...

Need Some Writing Prompts?

From the Romance Wiki, here's a list of common romance novel plot devices that might get you jumpstarted on a new plotline. I think I'm going to pick one from each category and stick them all in the same book...